I've been having this same problem since May of this year, when they added an update that introduced crossplay support. I had hoped that maybe the issue was my awful system, but I upgraded and tried it again today and had the same issue.
I know exactly how you feel, but the best thing that we can do is to continue to report on the issues, I'm hopeful that now that many more people have experienced the same issues that I have been having for over half a year now that it will be taken more seriously. When I was posting about it 6 months ago I was just a getting a barrage of 'works fine for me' type comments that just made it feel like I was totally alone with this problem.
Even though I have seen no fixes for this issue, the fact that Sean Drohan has consistently replied to these tech support threads gives me hope that there are devs who are working to resolve this issue among others.