Banned for I recommend, hired help. 

Banned for I can't afford it... unless the maid is happy to accept.... ahem.... bottle tops.

banned for capping the bottle top trade

Banned for not including Skully. 

That was a game I played as a kid. Basically you took the bottle caps, melted some wax in them and used them like marbles. I got pretty good at it. 

Then......BANNED for getting nostalgic.

Banned for making the past a moment away.

banned by the moment

Banned by momentum. 

banned for stopping

Banned for there's no moment like the present... and banned for stopping giving me a present at every moment.

Banned for presenting the moment. Its so fleeting.

banned for being so fleeting

Banned for not having a naval bone in your body.... but a bone in yer navel.

Q: What's a navel destroyer?

A: A hula hoop with a nail in it.

banned for 

Banned for whambling.

Banned for I once found love in the back of a whambulance... but that gas they give ya for pain does make ya think and do some strange things.

.... and she was the cutest paramedic I ever did see.

banned for gasing

Banned for contributing to global warming.... and who said you could self-flaggelate with an ugly stick?

banned for not understanding this thread.

Banned for even trying to.... understand it, that is.

banned for not letting the light shine

Banned for not inserting the batteries.... how'd yer expect the light ter shine wivvout 'em?

Banned for NiCads work wonders when they're not backwards.

Banned for some names spelled backwards still work.

banned for bass ackwards talking

Banned for frack to bont... and yeah, you'd be the sort of bloke who'd walk into a room arse first, so that if anyone asks you were just leaving.