Banned for historically hammering the point home with a croquet mallet.

banned for using the badminton racquet get your undies away from the dog 

Banned for putting yer old undies on yer dog to stop it crapping inside the house.

banned for letting your animals crap on the floor

Banned for giving them laxatives to ensure those poohs were deposited in places where people would step on them.

banned for letting the floor be your guide

Banned for thinking you can go dancing on the ceiling and not have your small change fall out of your pocket.

banned for thinking that i am so poor that i care about small change

Banned for not knowing that adding up a lot of small change makes for big money.

banned for trying to make cents

Banned for being a chocoholic and spending all your cents on Mars Bars.

banned for wiping out all the green men on mars

Banned for giving Cadbury's a bad name by referring to the green men trampling all over their choccies.

banned for shoving blueberries into a sock and smacking someone blue with it

Banned for shoving a sausage into a condom to make your endowment look bigger.

banned for making it all disappear

Banned for going MIA to go find yer 'sausage'.

Banned for caring where somebody else finds their sausage

banned for dropping in to point out someone else's flaws

Banned for equating sausage to a flaw. And for not respecting your elders. Or your elders' sausage.

Banned for complaining about the length of your sausage after seeing the size of an average salami.

banned for trying to change the average when there is no such things

Banned for exaggerating your Slim Jims.......Twiggies to the Aussies...   

banned for changing the name and canceling the culture the created the slim jim

you are all banned for letting the crickets come in