Banned for confusion is a state of mind... stop thinking and it will go away.      

Banned for thinking that thunkin' is a figment of an inane desire to understand that which is incomprehensible to a deluded mind, doesn't know squat. So there. Ha!

banned for the back quarter of your yard with it being missed used for a tool shed

Real simple. Just ban something and point it at the person above you. It's bases in reality is not required.

Banned for going down to the tool shed to see if you could find a bigger tool.... and while you were there you did.

banned for following and helping

Banned for getting disillusioned after going to Total Tools and finding out their tools are bigger than yours.

Banned for imagining there is a reality.

Now I'm stuck in it and it's all your fault.

Banned for getting stuck in the middle of it all.

Banned for spreading the glue around that got Go4Celerity stuck in a reality unbeknown to him because it's our crazy reality and not his rather nutty one.

banned for messing with the nuts and berries

Banned for going through my muesli to see what's in it.

Banned 'cause the Nutcracker isn't too far away. 

banned for getting to close

Banned for being so close that you could poke that short lady in the back with both hands behind your head

banned for having to put your hands behind your head because they overshadowed what you wanted to show off

Banned for not everybody is like you.... wanting to give the blue-veined hooligan freedom to breathe in the great outdoors.

Banned 'cause tic toc tocked 'fore it ticked. That's mine story and I stickin' to it.

Banned for seeking the time on a miniature of the town hall clock and thinking it's 1am because it let out a big dong.

Actually, it's 1.10am here right now.

Banned for bearing false witness to the time.

It is 1:08.

Banned for thou shalt not bring into question the time it is when I say it is that time.... cos I'm here and you're not.

Also banned for not living within the sound of Bow Bells... which on a fine day or any other, is the baby brother of Big Ben.

banned for going on about bells and whistles

Banned for getting your frills in ways other than whistles and bells... and deriving your thrills from Sweet Charlotte the Harlot's big bells while heartily blowing her whistle for all it's worth

banned for throwing in the coffee maker with the rest of the indignants 

Banned for throwing in the teapot without ingredients.

Banned for whistling at great dames.