Well the good news here is that Shaunna got her flight today and has landed in Tasmania.

And while the cat's away.... muggins here will take his orders by phone.

It sucks when:

* toilet paper manufacturers skimp on quality and your finger still pokes through after folding several sheets several times.

* you give up using their crappy toilet paper and revert to yesterday's newspaper.... then get print all over your date.

* your son missed yesterday's paper and wants to read an article from a page you used to wipe.

It sucks when:

* a handful of Oz politicians and their minders use taxpayer dollars to make more Ist class overseas flights in 12 months than the entire tourist contingent of Australia does in 48 months.

* taxpayers are funding politicians accomodation to the tune of $1200pw while in Canberra, yet some have mansions they rent out at rather large rents and are millionaires with huge gov't salaries, lurks and perks already.

* they have absolutley no shame and keep dipping into the public purse to live, act and travel like royalty.

* Guy Fawkes or somebody of his ilk isn't around to put a stop to it with a carefully planned expolosion.

* bombarding Parliament House with curried cabbage gas bombs would be a waste of time because their bullshit stinks far worse.

Yeah, Oz is reportedly in recession... yet our politicians are spending millions on themselves and seem to have no intention of stopping.  Bastards should use their parliamentary expense accounts to purchase ropes... then USE them.

True there and here...probably everywhere. Too bad folks just talk about it instead of going on a tax strike.

True, but if yer don't pay 'em tha bastards lock yer up.

It sucks when:

* political jokes get elected

* the elected political jokes think it's fine to spend up big at the expense of the Public Purse.

* you gotta shake your head in disgust cos the political jokes aren't funny.

* I couldn't persuade the Parliamentary Plumber to install exploding toilets.

.... It sucks when you're out & about, shopping for clothes, trying on a pair of new jeans and when you pull up the zipper you somehow catch your sac because you weren't paying attention and the incredible pain resulting from this action.... well you know, it sucks!

It sucks worse when:

* you pull up your zipper and catch the end of your nob.... and I don't mean by a bit of excess skin.

* you're totally busting and your zipper gets stuck firm.

* you've been to the loo and walked two whole blocks before somebody tells you that your zipper broke and not everything is tucked in.

* you're on the throne in a public convenience and a limbo dancer appears under the door, scares the bejesus out of you and your sphincter clams tight.

* the toilet paper runs out before you'e done and ask the person in the next cubicle to throw over a roll... it's empty as well.

* the faucet in the hand basin breaks, wets the front of your pants, so you stand up real close in front of the hand dryer and get strange looks cos everyone thinks you p!ssed yourself.

It sucks when:

You post a comment on a message board (NOT this one) and someone responds with a scathing barrage of insults the likes of which you'd expect from a Marine drill Sergent!

And then it sucks worse when:

You answer by informing said "person" that they don't know you or anything about you and why didn't the mods delete that post because it was a personal attack and then the mod posts TO YOU saying, more or less, that you shouldn't have had an opinion in the first damn place!

Now that really sucks.

    What sucks is when your whole life you wanted to fly in a plane but couldn't because it was so expensive and now one comes along and offers a flight for only $9.00 and you have $8.99 and you can't find one more penny because your unemployed.

Now there's no way I'd do that to you Mousey... that really sucks and the mods should stomp personal attacks/those making them.

It sucks when:

* someone is willing to teach you to fly but you casn't flap your arms hard enouugh cos of arthritis

* you sit at the back of the plane cos they don't reverse into mountains, but it crashes in the ocean and sinks tail first.

* your wife is invited to the cockpit to help the pilot with his joystick.... and later find out it had nothing to do with flying.

* your wife accuses you of a 'mile high' infringement when the hostie is mopping up the coffee she accidentally spilled in your lap.

* turbulence hits while you're in the lavatory joining the 'mile high' club, and you come out blue from head to toe from the toilet chemicals.

* you're flying at 30,000 feet, scared as hell and the in-flight entertainment is the !st episode of Lost, when the plane crashes.

* you forget to check for your lifejacket under the seat during the pre-flight safety blurb....but when it's needed after a crash at sea, you find somebody replaced it with an anchor.

Yes... that does suck worse, but I'm still in pain from my zipper incident so that will take precedence until I'm fully healed LOL!

Mouse post me a link, that doesn't seem right, the mods actually posted back telling you this?  Or was it someone else?

* you wake up 5 minutes before the alarm clock was set to go off and you figure you can get five more minutes but keep opening your eyes every thirty seconds and then finally you decide screw it, you'll turn it off and get up so you turn it off but lay there and fall asleep and wake up an hour later...

I know you wouldn't! And I can't think of a single person on this board who would.  Youse guys is my friends!  

This was a board on About.com and it's the Phoenix, AZ. section. so it would be the "expert" on Phoenix who runs it. She actually quoted my remark about being surprised that a personal attack wasn't deleted, so she obviously was offended by that! And here's what started it all. I said I wondered why if people move to Phoenix and hate it here, then why not go back home instead of running it down and complaining. And the expert, while admitting the response was nasty and uncalled for, said I started it by saying if people didn't like it here, then leave.

OMG! How could I say such a horrible thing!   Right?

I'll go hunt up the link for you, but it's a long thread! lol

Sorry to hear of your Zipper misfortune Rob, 'tis a nasty occurence and despite the jokes I do feel for you... here's hoping all heals well quickly, mate.

Done that more than twice and it sucks when:

* your alarm clock is confused between am and pm, so it either wakes you when you wanna sleep still, or doesn't go off when you wanna get up.

* you set the alarm for 8.00am and your missyus wakes you at 6.00 am for an imaginary burglar.

* your talking alarm clock wakes you to say that your'e an hour late for work, and you pissed the bed.

* you have a business apartment for during the week when you can't get home, but your wife, Anita, turns up midweek to stay, and the next morning the talking alarm says: "Good morning Melanie, Bill has already left and it's time to get up."

* your alarm clock is having an identity crisis and at 2.00am it thinks it is a smoke alarm.

* your alarm clock/phone/answering machine takes a message from your boss saying not to bother going in any more.

There is SOOO much stuff in that thread it would take you all day to sort it out. so I just copied the mods post!

Here it is:

"Frankly, I'm surprised your response wasn't deleted by the mods. This kind of attack usually is, on most boards."

Hello,

Just so you know, I did see that post. It was nasty and uncalled for, but it was in response to your post that basically said if you don't like it here, why not leave.

So, that was it. It quotes what I said at the top, so that must have stung, and she answered because of it. I did notice that something posted after this had been deleted, so maybe there was another attack on me, I don't know. 

You'd best know it, mg....you're one of the crew!

It sucks when:

* you procrastinate so much that you have brain fart and think up crap all day to write here in the threads.

* you haven't seen the outside world in so long, writing crap in the threads is the highlight of your day - week - year.... um, decade.

* you're so engrossed in writing crap in the threads you tell all your visitors about all the crap you've written.

* you've had a very tiring day thinking up crap, so you go to bed dog tired but dream about all the crap you're gonna write tomorrow.

* you wake up the following morning and can't remember a single bit of crap you dreamt about.

* you go to an ageing hypnotherapist to get it out of you but he's suffering old timer's and can't remember any of it, either.

* you know that you need to get a life but writing crap in the forums is way too much fun.

it sucks when you go to the supermarket and buy a whole heap of goodies and use your atm card only to find that you have 69 cents left in your account, the 20 bucks you thought you had in there was gobbled up by some kind of new fee the banks have dreamed up to justify takin more of yr money!  ...

and its more embarressing when you realize this and have to explain this to the 12 yr old check out chick who thinks yr nuts to begin with anyway.........LOL

its sucks when you cant remember if you had a shower this morning (at 4pm in the afternoon) and your only 35.

What are you gonna say when you hit 61 (actually it hits you), Vamps? 

It sucks When:

* you remember having the shower but forget if you used soap or not.

* you shave while in the shower to save time but cut yourself cos the mirror's steamed up.

* you have a nice clean shower then find out part way through drying yourself that the cat has left a deposit on the towel.

* you were in there earlier sticking down tiles and find you've mistakenly picked up the wrong bottle to shampoo your hair.

* you shower with a lady friend to save water and.... um, you 'grow' on her so can't turn around to wash the soap off your back.

* you shower with a man friend cos there's huge fines for using excess water and you're afraid to pick up the soap.

It sucks when you wake up.

It sucks when you wake up and creak from parts you only ever heard about in anatomy class....only to find out you cut class that day.

Can anyone tell me what the spleen is for? I cut the day they did 'spleen'.

*It sucks when you hear the surgeon say, "Whoops!". Especially if it's a circumcision.

*It sucks when you realize the Doctor cut class the day they learned about your problem.

*It sucks when you're the Doctor, and need an operation and the same Nurse you balled out is told to put the catheter in.

*It sucks when your Surgeon is the guy you almost flunked in Anatomy.

It sucks when:

* you got to the ATM to make a wthdrawal and it insists you make a deposit instead.

* you go into the bank to report someone is skimming cash from your card and find out it's them.

* you're so poor your monthy bank statement comes on the back of a postage stamp;

* the loans officer asks if you have $10,000 collateral on a $500 loan.

* despite signing in front of her, the teller refuses to accept the signature on the withdrawal slip is yours.

* your surrounded by armed security, weapons drawn, all because staff noticed your son is carrying a water pistol.

Seriously, now!!!  Kitty, if you have a Suncorp branch nearby, switch to them instead.  I have been with Suncorp for the last 6-7 years and have never ever paid accounting fees, etc... apart from a few small foreign currency conversion fees (something our dear gov't dreamed up) when I made overseas purchases via the internet using my debit card.  Suncorp has a 55+ account that is completely fee free... and no, you don't have to be 55+ to qualify for one.

So yeah, look into it... cos those fees chew up your cash and it makes a big difference when you don't get a lot to begin with. I've never had a problem with Suncorp, nor has any of my family, who are all with them as well.