1) If you are using Windows XP SP2's firewall or a third-party firewall on any supported platform, you must set it to allow PolMachine.exe to connect to the Internet and allow traffic on port 2509 (TCP). This also means ROUTERS. That said, you should be able to connect to other people's games and play them even behind the firewall. But hosting requires the open ports.
2) If you are playing on dial-up, slow the speed down some. Don't play at "Rabbit" speed for instance. When you play single player, experts tend to whale on various buttons in a sort of speed-dial like way. Don't do this in multiplayer if you're not hosting as you may find that lag loses some of your commands. Play deliberately. It's not an arcade game. 
3) In the lobby, use the refresh game option regularly to check for games.
4) From Stardock Central (www.sdcentral.net) go to the chat area and type /join #polmachine to talk to other people including the development team.
